And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
Randomize