Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Randomize
