Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
