So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Randomize
