I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
