4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
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