Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
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I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
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