Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Maybe he injected his testicle?
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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