Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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