Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Randomize
