P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
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Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
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