That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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