Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Randomize
