I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
