Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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