i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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