why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
they call him Oral-B. enough said
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
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