He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
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