are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
