you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
