So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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