if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
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