once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
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