I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
