he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
