My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
