goodnight i made you a song goodbye
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Randomize
