Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
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