I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
