Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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