quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
