You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
