We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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