You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Randomize
