I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Randomize
