But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize
