i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
