That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
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I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
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I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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