im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
