i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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