I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
they need to just BURY HIM!
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
