one might say we're banned from that church
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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