forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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