I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
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You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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