McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
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