I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize