I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize