Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
he thought i was a dude.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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