you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
