Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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