Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Randomize
